Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
