She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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