and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Randomize