I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
