Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize
