Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Randomize