that's an acceptable place to lick
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
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Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
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I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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