Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
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