I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize