I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
