we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
