Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize