when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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