you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize