What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Randomize
