You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
