Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
MIDGETS
????
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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