So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
