ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
