kristin has been a bad kristin
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Randomize
