sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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