The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
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