i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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