I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize