Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Randomize
