When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
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