I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday