I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
