What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Randomize
