just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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