It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
