You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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