My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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