I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize
