I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
