Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
do herpes really smell.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
