She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize