We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize