She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
you didnt know i had herpes?
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
The feeling are messing with the penis
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
