Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize
