so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
