So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Randomize