the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Holy sore nipples Batman
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
