I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
