I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
