Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
