that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
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