I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
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I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
What happened to fro yo and sex?
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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