its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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