I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
